About Journalismish
The Masthead
Dale Pruitt
Senior Correspondent, Things That Already Happened
Dale has covered every major story of the last thirty years, usually about four days late.
Marisol Vance
Technology Editor
Marisol has accepted the terms and conditions of every app ever made and read none of them.
Gordon Ashby
Business Desk
Gordon has never opened a spreadsheet but has strong feelings about all of them.
Dr. Penelope Quist
Science Writer
Penelope holds a doctorate in a field she will not name, peer reviewed by her cat.
Trent Kowalczyk
Sports Columnist
Trent is still not over a game from 1998 and would like to talk to you about it.
Bev Lattimore
Local Desk
Bev knows what your neighbors did last weekend and has filed it under news.
The Editorial Board
Opinion
Three raccoons in a trench coat, united by a shared distrust of everything.
The Fine Print
All stories, people, quotes and photos on this site are fictional and created for satire and parody. Any resemblance to real events is the universe's fault, not ours. Our reporters are not real either, which honestly makes them better at deadlines. Stories and photos are produced with the help of AI tools and edited by humans who should know better.